ARTICLES
WHY WRITE WHEN NOBODY READS?
TELL ME WHAT I DON'T KNOW!
YOUR MOTHER WAS RIGHT
ARE YOU TALKING TO YOURSELF?
WHAT ARE YOUR ADS REALLY SAYING?
ARE YOU A LEADER OR A FOLLOWER?
WHY ENGLISH TEACHERS DESPISE COPYWRITERS
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(This article appeared in the July/August 2004 issue of The Business 2 Business Marketer, published by the Business Marketing Association.)
“I’m sorry, but I can’t believe you actually get paid to write.”
The company’s resident proofreader – usually an intern or fallen English major – regards me with contempt. “Any seventh-grader knows you can’t use contractions. Look, you used a preposition to wrap this paragraph up.” Disgust flickers in her eyes. “And you can’t begin a sentence with a conjunction.”
Yes, you’re right. But then again, you’re wrong.
It’s a familiar situation – one that copywriters encounter frequently. We’re viewed as thoroughly incompetent because we start a single sentence in an eight-page brochure with “and.”
Even when a seeming grammatical faux pas doesn’t reduce a reviewer to such revulsion, it can trigger sincere questions. A client doesn’t want to approve copy that’s fundamentally incorrect or potentially embarrassing. Given that his or her sophomore English teacher lectured endlessly about the impropriety of opening sentences with conjunctions, it’s reasonable to ask whether the copywriter disregarded this critical rule or is just plain unaware of it.
Important, yet misunderstood.
Does grammar matter when it comes to copywriting? Absolutely. But copy to promote your company’s products shares little with those papers you wrote for Composition 101. In fact, if your ad, brochure or website’s copy’s grammar were to earn an A+ from your instructor, it probably wouldn’t be very effective in the marketplace.
Now, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m no grammarian. But most effective writers I’ve known weren’t expert grammarians. And most expert grammarians I’ve known weren’t effective writers. I suppose it reflects that right brain/left brain dichotomy.
Frankly, nearly everyone who made it through school thinks he or she retains a fairly good knowledge of grammar. In reality, baseball’s infield fly rule is more widely understood. Even your word processor’s whiz-bang grammar checker is frequently faulty (particularly where agreement issues are concerned). Little wonder that writers are often perceived as being wrong when we really aren’t.
A shifting foundation.
Grammar is a foundation – a framework of rules. And just as different types of buildings require different foundations, different types of writing demand different types of grammar. Nor is grammar timeless. Things have changed since you sat in Mrs. McGillicuddy’s room. A decade ago, I used E-Mail. For a while, I sent things through E-mail, then e-mail. Now you can contact me through email. That’s a dramatic example, but language, style and grammar do evolve constantly.
Our education system actually contributes to the confusion over copy and grammar. High school English teachers and college professors expect students to write in the standard style of the academic world. But that often cumbersome, frequently unfriendly style is used nowhere but within the halls of academe. Unfortunately, it sticks with many students long after they return their gowns and mortarboards. If you don’t believe me, pay closer attention to the memos circulating around your office.
Unlike Composition 101, copywriting isn’t about impressing a jaded professor. It’s about selling. Telling. Convincing. Entertaining. Emphasizing. Even infuriating now and then. Effective copywriting is also extraordinarily individual and personal. After all, an ad that appears in a million-circulation publication must connect with one reader at a time.
Keep it talky.
In fact, the more copy sounds like conversation, the more effective it tends to be. When people read, they typically hear the words, the structure and the syntax as a subconscious voice. That’s why you’ll sometimes bristle while watching a movie that has been adapted from a favorite book – because the characters don’t sound like they did when you heard them internally.
That doesn’t mean writers should ignore basic rules of syntax. A wise creative director once told me I could break a rule whenever I felt the need – as long as I could defend my reasoning and actually knew the rule I was breaking. In addition, the degree of grammatical correctness should reflect the situation, the medium and the audience. An ad for busy industrial purchasing managers doesn’t need to be as formal as a white paper directed to English teachers.
Common concerns.
Over the years, I’ve discovered that certain matters create anxiety when reviewing copy more often than others. Among the more common areas of confusion:
Contractions. There is absolutely nothing wrong with using contractions in copy. Please say that aloud three times. Contractions are a regular element of conversation, and they keep copy talky and friendly. Don’t avoid them because your English teacher wouldn’t let you use them. (How does “Do not avoid them because your English teacher would not let you use them” sound in comparison? Read both aloud. One sounds like you; the other like Queen Victoria.)
Conjunctions. Beginning a sentence with a conjunction is perfectly acceptable. And sometimes, it adds impact. But not if you do it too often. Or place them inappropriately. Treat conjunctions like spices: a little bit adds flavor, too much is overwhelming.
Fragments. As with conjunctions, it’s acceptable to use fragments in copy for impact, but do so sparingly. Otherwise the reader. Will believe. You have developed. A neurological disorder. Of some sort.
Second person. You’re not supposed to use the second person (you) in formal writing. But copywriting should be a personal, informal conversation between you and your audience, so it’s not only acceptable to use you, it’s actually a good idea.
Exclamation points. We know that one exclamation point (or bang) adds impact to a sentence, so using three must be really powerful, right? Wrong. Using one is a little like raising your voice just below a shout. Three is like yelling, waving your arms and jumping up and down on one foot. You’ll draw attention, but for the wrong reasons.
Quotation marks. Be careful about using quotation marks for anything but a direct quote, because they may imply that you’re trying to fool someone. If you say your widget is made out of “silver” or “real” silver, the reader will assume it’s an imitation. And please don’t use quotation marks around slogans and taglines, because they add nothing to (and often diminish) the value of those devices.
Misused ellipses. That friendly little dot-dot-dot may be something other than Morse code for S, but it’s not a substitute for commas and dashes. The ellipsis (...) should only be used to tell the reader that part or all of a sentence has been removed from a quote. I recognize that many people use it incorrectly ... like this ... but that doesn’t make it right.
Prepositions. You were taught that you’re not supposed end a sentence with a preposition. That was true even in informal writing decades ago. But again, styles change, and it’s no longer considered a mortal sin, especially if you do so only sparingly.
Parallel construction. Sometimes, writers use a technique in which two clauses or sentences employ nearly identical structure or some of the same words: “If you only a have a second, don’t settle for second-best.” People often question that approach, because we’re taught that variety in word choices and structure is important. That’s true, but parallel construction can add rhythm and even a little magic to copy. Again, treat it like spices.
Trust your writer to make the right choices for the audience and the needs of the project. Don’t let the grammar police be the ultimate judges of whether copy is good, bad, correct or effective. If you spot what appears to be an error, point it out. Ask for an explanation – but please realize that “it just sounds better that way” really can be a legitimate reason.
Most of all, measure your writers by effectiveness in achieving your marketing communications objectives, not by whether they live up to Mrs. McGillicuddy’s dictates.
Article copyright 2004 Scott Flood All Rights Reserved
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